Thy Mercy My God- Sandra McCracken

Aright, this is a big deal.  I am writing about my absolute favorite, most repeated (126 count on my iTunes so far, not including car and ipod time), most cherished song in the world.  I have been saving this song for the best time to write about it, and I think this month is it.  It's an old hymn covered by the wonderful Sandra McCracken.  Say 'McCracken' out loud like you mean it, it's fun.


It's hard to put into words how much Jesus loves me through this song.  The verses are of His heart, they plea and beg for His grace, still with confidence and faith knowing that He will provide abounding mercy and love.  I think I especially love this song because it is constant, it doesn't change.  It's strophic, meaning that the words of the verses change but the music just repeats.  So often I fall into a dangerous routine, and think I can just live my life on autopilot in self-seeking laziness, but when I ask God to give me the grace to be alive and awake to His heart and the opportunities to share His love, then I can hear every word of praise and the song/my life is refreshed.  I am humbled and renewed by the sweet melody and freeing poetry to God every time I hear this song; I am compelled to listen to it in times of suffering and in times of joy. I love that. Plus it has like the best banjo part EVER.  I love that too.


When I think about God's mercy, I think of my life before Christ.  It was painful, full of desperate attempts at finding fulfillment in anything and everything but God.  I think of the deep depression that robbed me of my joy and motivation in 8th grade and again Senior year.  I think of when I cared about what everyone thought of me and being a slave to getting affirmation from guys and from my friends, based on who I knew or what I did, not who I was, or further yet, who Christ redeems me to be.  But my poor, pitiful little life was so carefully constructed by His grace to bring me to this FREEDOM that I know now as His love.  His mercy has changed my life, even in the past year, even in the past hour.  Sin almost "reduced me to utter despair, but through His free goodness my Spirit's revived and He who first made me still keeps me ALIVE!"  


This song is new in my heart from so many different angles and perspectives.  My dear friend Libby (read her blog here!) has had cancer for the last 7 months and has gone through countless doctors apps, 12 chemo therapy treatments, and has humbly praised our Father who loves her the entire way.  Since Friday, she is free!  This song was playing when I found out.  Before Friday, I had never "wept for the praise of the mercy I've found." Libby is well, her cancer is gone, God is so good to us!


Psalm 86:12-13 I will praise you, Oh Lord my God, with all my heart; I will glorify your name forever. For great is your love toward me; you have delivered me from the depths of the grave.


Thank you, sweet Jesus.


Thy Mercy, My God (youtube)

Thy mercy, my God, is the theme of my song,
The joy of my heart and the boast of my tongue;
Thy free grace alone, from the first to the last,
Has won my affection, and bound my soul fast.

Without Thy sweet mercy I could not live here,
Sin would reduce me to utter despair;
But through Thy free goodness, my spirit's revived,
And He that first made me still keeps me alive.

Thy mercy is more than a match for my heart,
Which wonders to feel its own hardness depart;
Dissolved by Thy goodness, I fall to the ground,
And weep for the praise of the mercy I’ve found.

Great Father of mercy, Thy goodness I own
In the covenant love of Thy crucified Son;
All praise to the Spirit, Whose whisper divine
Seals mercy, and pardon, and righteousness mine.

Hallelujah...!

Live Forever- Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors

Drew and Ellie are sometimes very hard to listen to.  Especially right now.  They just love each other sooooo much; I feel like I need to guard my heart when I listen to "Hung the Moon" and "Magnolia Tree" haha. In all honesty, it's a very real dream of mine to make music with my husband one day.  Not that I'm concerned with getting married right now, I'm obviously not, but I just need to keep my wishful thinking in check when I listen to them.  But my best friend posted this song on my wall today and I love it (thanks Kate); she knows my heart and she knows how I work.  Sometimes she doesn't have the words to say to make me feel better, which is okay, but she always points me to Christ and shows me how much she cares in a really special way, and for that I am truly grateful.  

We went to West Point together this past weekend to visit our best friend Brian; we got to fly together, and roam Grand Central Station together, and were treated like princesses together.  It was what we needed.  We got our nails done in NYC and it was literally the best mani/pedi we've ever gotten (thank you to the sweet nail ladies who served us so well haha) and Brian and our great new friend Chris just made the weekend so special.  I don't remember the last time I laughed so much; we talked about Jesus together, we ate together, we were the "awkward" foursome together, we found rest together.  The whole weekend was just a gift, I'll cherish it for a long, long time.  Thank you to Brian and Chris for taking us into your strange and beautiful world and making us feel welcomed and safe and loved.

On a random note, fear has a much stronger grip on me than I thought.  Whenever people talk about fear, I think, "You're afraid, it's scary, and that is valid.  But God isn't scared.  He is in control, and He is good."  I constantly have to tell myself that.  Not once was Jesus fearful.  Jesus wept (John 11:35) but he was never scared.  Imagine having so much trust in our Father that we didn't even know what fear was.  I want to live in that.  Psalm 56:3 Fearless trust. 

My favorite line in this song is, "Some say faith is a childish game, well play on, children, like it's Christmas day!"

Live Forever-Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors